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Just do it
Much of my time is spent pointing out to patients that it is their choic
es in life that prevent them Scorn, being the person they want to be. The
long-haul lorry driver who wanted to study Shakespeare and the man
aging director who dreamed of resigning and growing roses are good
examples. Both had a real passion for what they wanted to do but
always gave the usual reasons for not changing their lives: mortgages,
relationship commitments, finances and, above all, fear - fear of change
and breaking out from a seemingly endless rut. There are reasons for
looking before jumping, but I became so frustrated with the lorry driv
er that I sat him down and asked him to write out what was stopping
him from achieving his dream. Once he had his list of negatives, we
looked at how big each problem was and what could be done about
I; f	each one - the list of positives. To his amazement, he found he could
afford to take a part-time degree and still work without jeopardizing
relationships or family. It took him 12 months to convince himself he
could do it, but he is now happily immersed in Shakespeare, quoting
huge chunks of the bard as he drives around the country.
If you want to do something you do not have to do it all at once. Remember, you can't be comfortable with yourself without your own approval. Ways of achieving your goals include:

.Personal Development
persevering. Telling people you are writing a book is a good way to make sure you don't give up when it gets tricky.
Answering the question 'What do I want to do more than anything else in the world?' It may be impractical: you may not be able to walk in the Himalayas — but you could go mountain climbing in this country.
I asked this question of a deeply depressed teacher, and he immediately said, 'I want to sell flowers.' Although this was an unexpected answer, I asked him to write his positive and negative lists, which he went away and did. Over the next few weeks he visibly recovered from his depression, but was always reluctant to discuss his dream. Some years later I walked into a florists in another part of the country and was amazed to be presented with a bunch of flowers by the same man. He had looked at his lists every day before going to school and eventually, realizing he had to be true to himself, had resigned his teaching job and taken over a struggling flower shop which he slowly turned around. He earned less, and worked longer hours than he used to, but I have seldom seen anyone as happy in their job. Taking me into the back of his shop he pointed out a framed yellowing piece of paper. He called it his 'qualification' and I recognized the lists he had drawn up four years earlier.

Changing one thing about yourself that you are unhappy with. This can be anything from your hairstyle to your timekeeping. Set a time limit to change and don't use the fact you are trying to change as an excuse for giving up in dim-cult times - the 'one cake won't hurt my diet' syndrome.
Committing yourself to action. If you want to run a marathon, getting sponsorship to run for a charity is an extra reason for

If you ever find yourself thinking 'I could do that,' try it. Surprise yourself and boost your self-esteem at the same time. Overcome obstacles gradually rather than all at once, or you will fail. Remember how to eat an elephant — bit by bit and very slowly.

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